You know what really gets me pumped to celebrate a simcha

like a bat mitzvah or a wedding? A Korean boy band. You haven’t been wished a mazel tov

mazel tov

Pronounced: MAHZ-ul tahv or mah-ZAHL tove, Alternate Spelling: mazal tov, Origin: Hebrew, literally "good luck," but usually used to mean "congratulations."

until you’ve been wished a mazel tov by Korean men in MC Hammer pants. Behold:

I have so many questions. Beginning with: Why is one of them stuck in a glass pyramid? What’s with the brass knuckles? Why are they listing the days of the week? Is that one guy really wearing a huge white sequined tie over his right shoulder?

But what I really want to know is, WTF does this mean?? And baruch hashem, Google comes to the rescue. According to jpopasia here’s a snippet of the translated lyrics:

I’m very very afraid that your heart will always act as if it doesn’t know me and forget
Only just happening, meeting other people is useless
When you see me, are you also hurt? If you’re hurt, tell me

Mazeltov have strength, Mazeltov smile,
Mazeltov, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday
Mazeltov, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday
I hope you will at least give me some strength, my my my girl

Mazeltov have strength,Mazeltov smile, 
Mazletov, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday
Friday, Saturday, Sunday

Oh uh uh uh uh uh uh, dis dis discard and surprise yourself
Latin girl, Mexican girl, Korean girl, Japan girl
I want to dance for 365 days, yeah yeah yeah mirror mirror mirror

Hm. Now I have even more questions.

Mainly, though, I just want to introduce these guys to the ladies of Eshet Hayil

Also, I want them to go on tour with the Chevra video guys.

I think these three groups should get together and do a really stunning version of the Four Questions a la We Are the World.